It just goes to show that the my tastes and that of certain more famous internet movie bloggers are not exactly the same. This is just as well, expected, and the normal order of things. However, to be so at odds with the perception of a particular movie (just don't see what he sees in her)...must meditate upon this. I mean, I like trashy cinema (though prefer sexy over violent, if given my druthers), but it has to have a certain vibe, a certain cool, a savour faire, nes pas? Above all, it has to be clear it accepts what it is and is having fun with it.
Not fun trash cinema is...well...not fun.
Which brings us to our subject. Machine Girl. This one has the raw material for a Stoney fav. Cute girls. Mayhem. Cool weapons. Sheer over the top badassery. And it fails miserably. Let us examine why. Ami is the heroine, a tough, athletic but still normal girl. Her brother is murdered by school bullies who apparently are associated with a local organized crime syndicate. She goes looking for revenge. More murders result in her losing an arm, gaining a mini-gun prosthetic and an angry widow sidekick. They both go look to take down the big boss after some leveling up. All this is punctuated by the most unrealistic, over the top and GORY, gory, gory violence. We are talking just about every death accompanied by arterial spray as if it came from a fire hose.
Much of this resembles some of the earlier work of Sam Raimi, most notably the Evil Dead series. Or Peter Jackson's early zombie movies. Just picture hyperkinetic camera work, a raided butcher shop for the SFX and the most acrobatic, yet cheap stunt work you've ever seen.
Why does it not work? Because it takes itself so damn SERIOUSLY. The characters seem to operate in one of two modes. They are either earnest, or deadly serious. No embracing the sheer mania of what's going on, Viagra couldn't make this thing play straighter in actor execution.
The ONE character who plays this for the camp it is is the alpha female in the ninja clan. Even to the point where her bountiful bosom is sheathed in a bladed bra which is used to mutilate the other characters, including the heroin's co-located girl parts (I cringed, big time). But that and the fact that the bra never comes off to reveal the one really decent rack in the whole film? Even at the end when it clearly looks like it's about to happen?
All that blood and not one, NOT ONE pair of boobs?
I felt fairly dirty coming from this movie.
I don't feel that way about most porn I've seen.
Machine Girl. Send this one back to the manufacturer, fails to meet consumer expectations.
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